Why Being STUCK Doesn't Have To SUCK
Have you ever been stuck? You know you have a goal you want to reach and you can’t seem to move a muscle toward that dream! Maybe it’s a career goal, weight loss or something else on your list. You have tried things but nothing seems to work. And so then you start to lose hope, fall into a malaise and before you know it you are stuck in the mud. And we HATE to admit that we are stuck. After all, who wants to listen to the complaints, right? Even you can’t stand your own mind-chatter-whining!
But, consider this: what if being stuck is necessary? What if being stuck isn’t a bad thing, but a part of a process that can’t be sidestepped? What if being stuck can actually be soul serving and nurturing instead of torturous and lonely?
I’ve been stuck. In fact, this summer, I was going through some stuck-ness. And truth be told, it did suck for a while, until I decided to take my own advice and tap. I tapped in the morning when I got up and I tapped at night before I went to bed. The tapping helped me to think more clearly and release the tightness and judgment I had about being stuck. Once that dissipated, my mind opened up to possibilities. The possibility that maybe feeling this way was an invitation to explore something that was holding me back. Here are the realizations that using EFT tapping on my stuck-ness helped me conclude:
1. Even Though I’m Stuck, I’m Totally O.K. (great set-up statement for your tapping by the way). Think about that a minute. We are ingrained as a society to multi-task and keep moving and go, go, go. So the feeling like you can’t get momentum on a specific project, goal or even your business can be daunting. It’s helpful to separate the who of who you are with the current state of stuck-ness. You are stuck, but you are still o.k.; you’re not weird, you’re not wrong and for heaven’s sake you are good enough!
2. It’s Just Not Time Yet. I don’t remember where I heard it but someone said imagine a rose. Each day the petals slowly open – in stages. And you don’t stand there and yell at it to hurry up and open fully. It’s the same with us. We bloom. We birth. Everything in its own time.
3. A Pity Party is Still a Party. Yeah, I went there. Sometimes it just feels good to sulk, feel sorry for yourself, cry and wallow. It’s an important release for when things aren’t going exactly how you would like. The key – and here’s the key just like when you are an invited guest at a party – don’t stay late and be the last one to leave.
4. It’s O.K. to Be Nice (to yourself). Sometime when you are stuck and feeling badly about a situation, you tend to fall off the wagon in good commitments to yourself; the healthy eating goes out the window, you skip the gym, maybe have one or two more glasses of wine than you should, the gratitude list is nowhere to be found. This only adds to the state, so remember to be kind to yourself. Maybe take a nice long bath, listen to your favorite music or go for a walk in nature. Whatever it is, just give yourself a break!
5. Stop Fighting. What we resist persists, so don’t push up again the stuck-ness with a bunch of self-doubt, anger and judgment. Feel it and let it go. Tapping is especially great to use for this.
Here is an EFT tapping script to help when you are stuck:
IE: I hate being stuck
OE: It feels so hopeless
UE: I just want something to change
UN: Then I won’t be stuck and I’ll feel better
CP: Look at everyone else around me
CB: They are moving along nicely with their goals
UA: And here I am stuck in the mud
TH: Everyone else is going to get ahead and I’ll be right here
OE: I just don’t see anything changing soon
UE: That sucks
UN: I know people say things can change in a moment’s notice
CP: But not for me
CB: I’m just not lucky that way
UA: I’m going to be stuck forever
TH: That’s just how it is
IE: I wonder if it is possible to be different
OE: Maybe I need to be here right now
UE: I’m open to considering that
UN: What if I could nurture myself right now?
CP: Maybe that would help me get unstuck
CB: What if I could say “I love being stuck”!
UA: And try to mean it!
TH: What would be possible for me?
IE: I guess I could try it
OE: Maybe just for a little bit
UE: Because sometimes being stuck actually feels good
UN: Being stuck doesn’t feel good
CP: Being stuck feels good
CB: Being stuck doesn’t feel good
UA: What if I could love being stuck?
TH: What would be possible then?
IE: I don’t want to love it because I don’t want to STAY STUCK.
OE: o.k. so maybe I can tolerate it
UE: I can tolerate being stuck and be open
UN: Be open that things will change at the perfect moment
CP: Be open that I can create the change when I feel ready
CB: I can learn to accept and release
UA: I accept being stuck and I release it
TH: I am releasing being stuck
Paula G. Rosario
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