2/12/2013 0 Comments
Welcome again to the Guilty Pleasures Revolution!
Today, on Day 10, we're going to talk about a small little word with great big power.
No…… Sometimes the littlest things have the biggest impact in our lives. Take the word no for instance. Such a small and simple word, but, boy, does it pack a powerful punch. By and large, the word no is restricting, disempowering, negative, limiting. No matter what language you say it in, for such a tiny word, no is powerful.
No even has its own symbol!
As a working mom, no also carries a lot of baggage. With all the negativity surrounding no, it’s no wonder that saying it – and really meaning it – isn’t easy when it comes to setting boundaries for ourselves.
According to the queen of self-care, Cheryl Richardson, “Setting strong boundaries is the number one way for most women to improve their lives.” In her book, The Art of Extreme Self-Care, she teaches that setting boundaries all starts with self-awareness.
By nature, I am a helper, giver, up-lifter, encourager and healer, so setting boundaries was not always an easy thing for me to do. So to heighten my self-awareness and overcome resistance, I created 3 easy steps:
1. Reframe: The word “boundaries” itself felt heavy (and pushed my guilt button), so I found my own language and renamed it “loving fences.”
2. Visualize: Close your eyes and imagine or visualize what your loving fences will look like. Make them beautiful, protective, and impermeable. Once you’ve created them, sit inside them and feel how good it feels to protect your heart and your energy, so that when you do say yes to others, you give out of love and gratitude, rather than resistance and regret.
3. Speak: Speak with conviction. If your words say no, but your tone and body language are wishy-washy, chances are you won’t be believable.
If you really mean no, avoid saying:
There are plenty of GOOD reasons why saying no is good for everyone.
Next time you are asked by someone to go somewhere or do something that you know in your heart, you’d really rather not do, call up your vision and surround yourself with your loving fences.
Affirmation for Day 10: When I choose me and say no to others, it is a gift to me and to them.
Be sure to watch your inbox for Day 11 of the Guilty Pleasures Revolution!
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Here's to choosing you!
Paula G. Rosario
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